I've been actively ignoring this crap for some time. But I finally found one that intrigued me and seemed to have potential. It was intriguing because it looked like Tiny Tim but was tarted up like a cheap whore, complete with rosy cheeks, pastel eye shadow and brazen lipstick. My failure to take a before photo sickens me, mostly because I was driving home repeating, "Self? Make sure you take a before photo of the Tiny Tim Whore Head-Shelf." Instead I immediately sprayed it with Krylon black primer.
Yeah, that photo is terrible. Here's what I did to it:
Now it's Undead Tiny Tim. Seriously, what would you put on one of these? A candle? When it falls to the ground it will burn your house down. A snow globe? It already weighs a ton. These things make no sense to me.
Want to see what else doesn't make sense?
Why does this thing look exactly like Thora Birch? Behold:
Seriously, does anyone know Thora Birch? Because I would totally send this to her. I might come off like some twisted stalker, but if there was a head-shelf that looked like you, wouldn't you want to know about it? I can't really alter this one because I would be turning Thora Birch into a zombie. So I don't know what I'm going to do with it. Right now I'm concentrating my efforts on removing some gross green gunk from the top, probably used to unsuccessfully affix a snow globe or candle:
Ms. Birch? It's yours if you want it. Holla. (Love your work!)