Saturday, September 10, 2011

Killamari...If You Will

I mentioned I have taken up cross-stitching, yes? Well I found what I believe to be the only cross-stitch book I will ever need: Makato's Cross-Stitch Super Collection!

I can attest that it is Not Lame! It's Very Cool! Of course Mr. Oozu follows fiber-art book Standard Protocol by providing a cross-stitch lesson and some tips, and adds ways to cross-stitch on some things you didn't know could be cross-stitched on. But mostly it's packed with a whole bunch of tiny rad patterns for things like robots, dinosaurs, skeletons, this swordfish I keep forgetting to make, all kinds of dope little stuff. I wish all books were this awesome.

The patterns are quick to stitch up, and are easily adapted if you need a color substitution. And it turns out you can combine them to create a hideous affront to God:

THE HORROR!! Dear SyFy Channel: I know what you're thinking. And you really do owe me for the countless hours I've wasted watching your terrible shitty movies. But this is not a Sharktopus -- it's a KILLAMARI!!...if you will.

I buy those tiny frames at the craft store for a couple of bucks and keep them around so I can whip up a quick gift. That weird lump on the left side of the frame is where I took out the hook and screwed it into what I decided was the top. Not attractive, but neither is DEATH BY KILLAMARI!! And if anybody has a suggestion on how to put the damn frame on in the first try, or even the third try, I'd like to hear it.

I also typed "AC/DC font" into google so I could make this for my friend who I hope doesn't actually read my blog because I haven't given it to her yet:

Kay, if you're watching, act surprised.

The BZA's 1st birthday is coming up and I've got something in the hopper right now which, with any luck, will also be an affront to God. Fingers crossed!