Thursday, September 20, 2012

101 Uses for Pron (and One Use for Plasti Dip)

This year at Dragon*Con I was able to find my favorite vendor again and plop down $20 for 12 vintage porn mags. He didn't have any swingers catalogs like before, but he had a ton of Leg Action and magazines featuring big butts. It turns out that "Leg Action" is code for "foot fetish." Who knew!

The first thing I did was decoupage my very last bamboo tray:

"Bing Crosby says: Man, this is really relaxin'..." Sorry, Bing.

Then I made a puzzle for my brother to thank him for his contribution to Dragon*Con this year:

I found these packs of blank puzzles with envelopes that I guess you're supposed to draw on or whatever. I decided to glue pictures on instead. I have a lot of trouble cutting through the photo around the puzzle shapes, so these have turned out rather messy. But I'm working it out.

I have to return some things to KC/DC that ended up in our stuff after the Con, so I made her a lovely gift bag:

And I wanted to finish up a conversation that my brother and I started in the Hilton stairwell, so I made one more postcard. I ran out of room on the back, so the final sentence had to wrap around to the front side:

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Folks, I can't get enough of this foot porn. My apologies to anyone that has this fetish for real, but I just think it's hilarious.

I also think it's hilarious that after inflicting so much pain on me in the past (and future), the postal service has to keep enduring my postcards because it's THEIR JOB, and also because I put no return address on the postcards and THEY HAVE NO CHOICE. MWAHAHAHAHAHAH.

And lastly, I finally cracked open that can of Plasti Dip because I had an actual reason to: stamping metal letters into sheets of metal on a metal block with a hammer pretty much killed my left hand for two days. So I decided to Plasti Dip my hammer. That's it on the far left:

The rest are assorted doll parts that I have been saving up. Dipping doll heads into Plasti Dip is way satisfying. But since the only color Home Depot carries is black, it gives everything an 80s Environmental Statement feel. Like I should pile up the coated doll parts next to an oil drum with "Toxic Waste" painted on the side and mail the whole thing to Emilio Estevez. Outside of that, I have no idea what I'm going to do with this stuff, but the important thing is that I stunk up the whole house for two days.

And here's the project that caused the arthritic hand:

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N.U.T.S.A.C. IS GOIN' LEGIT. Our actions can no longer be questioned! We have Important Business that must be carried out, and now we have Official Badges to prove it. Best to just stay out of our way.

My plan is to use these metal letters to stamp new brass plates in order to re-christen thrift store trophies. I have one at home that I am preparing, and I hope it works out. Because I have seen the cost of engraving and it horrifies me. I own a dremel and an engraving tool, but my handwriting is abysmal so that's not an option.

Tip of the Day: Pay close attention if you purchase a set of these metal letters -- many of them are brush script. And no one wants that. *shudder* Also I stamped my keyring (pictured) with the comma instead of the period. Rookie mistake, but you can't actually tell. Okay, that's two tips. Now I need a nap.

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