Keeping Sexy Time

Remember the Tu-Clock I made for Gaby? Well, I decided to make a Prince clock for my husband.

You'd be surprised how hard it is to find a poster for Purple Rain nowadays. At least I was. I ended up ordering this (gigantic, expensive) Japanese Iris print:
We were a little concerned about it being an Iris print and not a glossy poster because we wondered if the mod-podge would cause it to run. I ran some tests with some other stuff printed off an inkjet. The tests did not run, so we went for it, and it ultimately worked just fine.

I definitely wanted to concentrate on Prince's handsome visage, so I traced the wooden plaque right over the spot we wanted. I cut it out and decoupaged it onto the plaque.
After it dried I painted the outside edge black, because the gold paint I have is really transparent. Also you can kind of use the black to clean up the edges if they are rough.Then when the black was dry I painted two or three coats of gold.
Time to pour the EnviroTex Lite Pour On High Gloss Finish! (I have exactly one half of the 16 oz package left over from the Tu-Clock.) Which is horribly messy business, and your piece has to be perfectly flat on a raised surface (I put a block of wood under it), and you have to cover everything in a one-mile vicinity with plastic, and monitor for drips, and keep the temperature right, and be in a non-dusty area (which does not exist in my house), but is TOTALLY WORTH the payoff.Behold the drips. It pretty much keeps dripping the whole 72 hours. Do not worry about this, as there will still be plenty of acrylic on the piece. Even though it doesn't seem like there will be. Just trust me.

So he dried beautifully (except I got a gold fingerprint on the windshield before I poured the acrylic and it wouldn't come off that mod-podge for anything) and then sat around for about 3 months while I waited for my husband to do his part which was to sand the drips off the back and drill the hole for the clock kit. His desire for Sexy Purple Time in his office finally won out over his procrastination.

When he drilled the hole for the Tu-Clock there were absolutely no problems. He drilled a small pilot hole and then the real one while I cringed in the living room and tried not to cry. It came out perfectly. This time the acrylic did something weird -- there is a strange halo around the hole. I decided to make the best of it and used the halo to lay out the adhesive numbers. You can see it in this finished photo:The first photo I shot was totally a picture of me reflected back at myself. This baby is the very definition of "high gloss." Sexy high gloss.

The husband is very pleased. Now I just have to get him to hang it in his office.

Crap I Have Made For Gaby

This is what Gaby got for Xmas last year:

It started off as a lovely painting of a Great Dane (I think?) until the little guy started running around with a very materialistic crowd. Suddenly he found himself wearing a grill, a medallion, and bootleg NBA gear, and getting tattooed. He also became the proud owner of a gold-plated Hummer. Bad dog!

Her birthday present was a little more involved. It started with this poster and a dream:


I bought a blank wooden plaque and a clock kit at Hobby Lobby. For some reason there was a box of acrylic epoxy in my garage. I've had it for years and never used it - EnviroTex Lite Pour On High Gloss Finish, 16 oz package. Luckily, all the new-fangled craft shows on DIY and whatever that other home channel is have all been pouring this type of acrylic lately, so I had all the steps pretty much memorized and knew all the tricks.

I decided what part of Tupac I wanted to show on the plaque, and traced around the plaque. I cut him out, then decoupaged him to the wooden board. I sprayed the back of the poster with water first, which one of the craft shows said would keep it from bubbling, but it really didn't. I might not have used enough water. In retrospect I should have used a brayer. But I had purchased two posters and two plaques just in case I screwed it up, so I kept going.

After he dried I trimmed closer to the board with an exacto knife. I decided I wanted the sides of the plaque to be gold, but I know from experience that the gold paint I have is pretty watery and transparent no matter how thickly I put it on. So I first painted the sides with black acrylic paint. This also served to cover up any messy bits of bad trimming.

Trimming Tupac out to look his best left some bits of his name where I didn't want them. I had "AC" and a big squiggle to cover up, so I used a wash of white acrylic paint. The wash didn't work very well - oil is much better for washes - so I ended up really just painting and trying to blur the edges.

After all that business was dry, it was time to mix up the acrylic. Talk about paranoia - this was the serious point of no return. I read the directions about a million times, used a level to make sure Tupac was lying flat on the raised blocks I was using, and mixed up the proper amount of acrylic coating. It pours on really thick, so there was no need to shore up the sides with tape or anything. I smeared it around to make sure it coated the whole plaque. Then it was time to monitor for drips. It did pretty well, but there was one area of the plaque that would not stop dripping, despite the fact that I babysat it for an hour and half. Ultimately I was forced to go on with my life and just let it do its thing. It had to cure for 72 hours.

On Sunday I wrangled the husband into the garage to get ready to drill the hole for my clock kit. First of all the clock kit I purchased had a stem that was too short to make it all the way through the clock and the acrylic coating, so I had to go to Joanne's. (I would have gone to Hobby Lobby, but they're home with their "families and their God" on Sundays.) I returned with the correct size, and we began planning for the hole.

I was absolutely terrified that the acrylic would shatter, so I didn't make it very easy for my husband to do his job. I put some tape over Tupac's eyes so he didn't have to watch, and I went inside the house to sob and rock back and forth in the corner. A few seconds later my husband called out, "It's done." I ran out madly to check the hole, and it was perfect. He also put a hanger on the back and sanded off the few drips I didn't catch. Thanks, Honey.

The clock stem was a very close fit and almost too short again, so I glued the base to the back with E6000, and I cannot say enough good things about E6000. I attached the hands, put the battery in, set the time, and here he is:


I think he turned out pretty damned good.

Here's the back:

I gave Gaby the extra poster to do with as she wishes. I have not decided what to do with the extra plaque, but I do believe another clock is in order. I have just enough acrylic coating to do another plaque that size, and I love the result.

My goal is to fill Gaby's entire house with shit that I made for her, so her house becomes a living shrine to our love.

Up next: Etching