Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Widowna Spyder And Other News

Compared to Hotlanta, Utah has zero bugs. It is awesome! But the Basement Bunker does get random ants during the "warm" periods when the temp gets over like 35 degrees. The latest Bunker issue is flying ants. For the record, I don't care for them. So I did not question why they disappeared. One day I looked under my bathroom sink:

Behold Widowna Spyder, the black widow! I named her after the Cowboy's Hollywood girlfriend so he won't kill her. He is a little uncomfortable, mostly with the fact that she's been there for two weeks and I only mentioned it last night. Keep eating those flying ants, girlfriend! And please don't give birth to a million babies. Thanks.

Continuing to sort through the rubble, let's see what randomness is lurking around...

I bought this cow skull on our trip to Moab, then covered it in chalkboard paint:

These were my xmas cards:

A little fold-out stand on the back allows it to perch on your shelf for eternity so you never ever have reason to throw it away. [Incidentally, Utah's shape is really useful for crafting.]

There's a dairy here that produces some terrible shit called Rootbeer Milk. It tastes just like those tiny rootbeer hard candies, but only for 1.5 seconds, and then the weird chemical taste kicks in. The Cowboy looovves it. Here's how I feel about it:

I cross stitched the t-rex pattern from the Greatest Cross Stitch Book Ever Written, Makato's Cross-Stitch Super Collection, using glow-in-the-dark floss which looks very impressive when you hold it directly on a lightbulb for like 2 whole minutes:

I hung on to it, and then when I moved here I kept seeing billboards for Utahraptor, so I knew what had to be done:

Do not credit Makato for that masterful lettering. That's all me.

And last but not least, here's N.U.T.S.A.C. Brother Cody running a Car Cookies clinic last summer in the parking lot:

His car smelled delicious for the rest of the week. Line forms to the left, ladies! You know you love a man that can bake. *SWOON*

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